The word boundaries has about the same connotations as the word cilantro.
You either love it, or you hate it.
(I am on team cilantro and team boundaries.)
I have a lot of my friends who know very well whom they should form better boundaries with. They talk about it at length…but often, not with the person who needs to hear the message.
This is a meditation, not a manifesto, so let’s get to it.
If you are feeling the icky inner sense that arises after not setting a boundary, have a seat. Rather than simmering in anxiety with how setting that boundary will go down, sit with the feeling that arises when you don’t.
How is that serving you? Do your body and mind feel good around continuing to ignore your own needs in exchange for another’s?
Likely the answer is no. Meditation is not about finding solutions. It is about feeling.
Once you stop running and you feel all the feels, you can no longer ignore the need for a boundary.
Even if it’s uncomfortable.
Even if it’s the last thing you want to do, it’s better than continuing to live with the inner icks.
When you feel like you have done the hard work (because sometimes meditation is freaking hard, even though from the outside, you may look as peaceful as a dove), let yourself exit with a big sigh.
Inhale, exhale… then let out a huge sigh.
Picture your whole body, releasing some of the tension that has built up as a result of ignoring the lines that need to be drawn.
Out of the meditation, you can start the process of being clear, being polite, and of being firm.
Peace be with you.
